Slaunchcast: I'm so fly

People stare at me only for good reasons -- like my magnetic attractiveness.

Music by Podington Bear (song: "Sunspots").

Slaunchcast: You're KILZing me

If you name your paint product "KILZ," you really can't afford to make potentially creepy ads. Elsewise, would-be comedians will try to wipe the walls with you.

Music by Kevin McCleod (song: "Sunshine") and Podington Bear (song: "Multicolor Stresstab"); audio from a KILZ commercial.


P.S. Did you know you subscribe to and download these sporadic audio postings in iTunes? Well, you can. Click on the image below:

Or, if you don't want to use iTunes, or want to subscribe using a different podcast aggregator, this is my Slaunchcast feed.

Slaunchcast: Mother's Day is for the birds

What happens when Mother's Day and International Migratory Bird Day fall on the same day? Bad things.

Music by Podington Bear, bird ambiance by dobroide, footsteps by Robinhood76, and
slap by Syna-Max.

Slaunchcast: AT&T is already here

AT&T recently announced plans to buy up 1.5 million Alltel users in 19 states - including my own Wyoming. My question: what's the point?

Music by Podington Bear.

Pete Waterman: Millionares being exploited

Sorry guys, but I just want to tell you how I'm feeling.

The co-writer of the Rick Astley classic, "Never Gonna Give You Up," called a press conference today to complain that he hasn't gotten richer lately.

Thanks to a bizarre online meme called "Rickrolling,"Astley's 1987 music video has become a smash Internet sensation, being viewed some 154 million times on YouTube. For all that exposure, however, Waterman received only $16 in YouTube ad revenue.

I'll admit it: that sucks. But Waterman's hyperbolic whining is pompous and pathetic.

"Panorama did a documentary on the exploitation of foreign workers in Dubai," he told reporters. "I feel like one of those workers, because I earned less for a year's work off Google or YouTube than they did off the Bahrain government."

Wow.

Good point, Pete. Because, as you know, those workers also have a net worth of $45 million. And Google, much like an evil government, is definitely reaping IMMENSE economic benefits from your videos on YouTube.

There's more I could say, like, "You really don't deserve payment for most of those views," and "Those views probably translated to more CD sales, anyway," but instead I'll just say this:

Pete, you've let me down.

Don't worry: the cat-fish is hyphen-allergenic

There are things you just can't do at a Chinese restaurant - like carelessly label food items that contain the word "cat." It's a scientific fact that in every Asian eatery there is always at least one wiseacre just waiting for an excuse to tell a joke about pet-eating.

So when I ran across this sign at my local Chinese buffet a couple weeks back, I had to ask: why, as an entrepreneur, would you open yourself up for criticism with an unnecessary hyphen?

And for the record, the underlines don't help.Even as a regular customer, I have to say the sign was enough to give me paws.

The blue pill reveals true nature

Some photoshop doodling.Some context. The rest of the context would be the unsolicited emails indirectly from True that have flooded various inboxes of mine over the years.